Hi there, it's been a minute since I've posted on NG. I had left this wonderful community behind, after embarrassing myself on the public forum multiple times with a shitty, self-entitled attitude. Had a lot to think about over the past several years; after reaching my 30s, moving to Los Angeles just three weeks before COVID changed the world, going through two therapists, an ADHD diagnosis, losing 90 lbs (and gaining back 40 of them), a nasty breakup, and almost being homeless before moving back to Florida, it's safe to say that I've had quite a journey, much of it coming close to rock-bottom. Having to fly back home with my tail between my legs, feeling like I had failed my dream of being an LA film composer, was a tough pill to swallow, and at this point, I don't know if I'll ever fully recover from that. Safe to say that I deserved it though, because all those experiences were hard lessons on how to treat people, and to live my life with honesty and accountability (things that I'm still learning, to be completely honest).
As for the music stuff, I can only hope that where I go from here will be a path that keeps me creative and pursuing my dreams. Who knows? Maybe I'll end up doing things that will make me happier than a career in film music. Over the years, I've watched some of my peers who I had considered "newbies" fly past me and kickstart amazing music careers of their own, while I had fallen behind, pretty much in the same place where I was ten years ago (2013 was the year I created this account). Talk about a wake-up call! On the other hand, this unhealthy habit of self-comparing is partly what held me back for so long (among many other things), and so I try to toss aside my fragile ego, and approach music with an empty cup. Furthermore, I started taking up voice acting, in which I totally am an empty cup, so that helps to provide some much needed perspective. I'm gonna end this entry here before this turns into a novel, so until next time - I look forward to reconnecting with this community!
-Jake